Our Wedding Was a Disaster!

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In honor of our 4 year wedding anniversary, I want to tell you about our crazy wedding. I’ll go ahead and warn you: this post is long! Have you ever heard the saying, “the worse the wedding, the better the marriage?” Well, I think it’s true because our wedding was AWFUL! We got engaged on New Years Eve 2008 (January 31st, 2007 around 11pm, to be exact) and planned our wedding on a very tight budget. By tight budget, I mean we spent under $1000, including my engagement ring. We had a lot of friends and family help us out – Phillip’s parents paid for/made the food, his grandma made our cake, his aunt did our photography and his uncle was the minister; my mom paid for getting my hair done on our wedding day and my jewelry; also, our friends went in half with my mom for a nice hotel on our wedding night.

In order to save money, I slaved over handmade wedding invitations, bouquets, boutonnières, corsages, centerpieces and other decor. I saved a LOT of money but I also wasted a lot of time because I’m sure the wedding invitations were eventually thrown away and the decor was only used for a few hours. We also wasted some money by being nice. We only had a maid of honor and a best man so we bought their clothing so they wouldn’t have to spend a bunch of money. They both looked fantastic BUT they changed out of their clothes right after the ceremony. I didn’t understand why at the time but it was because they went to “decorate” (aka TRASH) our getaway car (did I mention I HATE that tradition?) and they didn’t want to mess up their clothes. I still don’t understand why they didn’t change back but oh well. Okay, so that wasn’t a “disaster” but I’ll get there, I promise.

My mom helping with my veil

The morning of our wedding went pretty well. I got my hair done and spent the morning with my mom, trying to relax. We asked the wedding party to be at the church 2 hours before the wedding so we could get some of the pictures done (bride with wedding party, groom with wedding party, etc). I wanted to get them all done but our photographer (Phillip’s aunt) refused, saying that it’s “bad luck.” Well, our best man and maid of honor were some of the last people to the church so we got maybe 10 pictures taken. The really annoying part about that comes later.

During our wedding ceremony

When the ceremony started, I was nervous but I knew it was short so I wasn’t as scared as I could have been. What I didn’t know was how short it really would be. Kevin, the officiant and Phillip’s uncle, did a little speech at the beginning and then we prayed. Then, we did the “I Dos”. He then had us exchange rings. My wedding order had the exchanging rings part almost at the end so I was starting to freak out a little bit. I whispered “what about the vows?” and Phillip whispered “I think they come later” but I knew they didn’t because I wrote the order myself. Then we did the unity sand ceremony. After the sand ceremony, Kevin paused to find his place and realized that he forgot the vows and he just started improvising. He did the “I Dos” again and did a mini sermon about love and marriage while also asking us if we agreed to love, honor, cherish, etc. (so we kinda did our vows but not really). Then, he had us kiss and pronounced us man and wife and we were done. From start to finish, our wedding was about 12 minutes, including several long awkward pauses.

Our wedding reception entrance

After our ceremony, we visited with a few people and then we got started on pictures. Our photographer was sooooo slow. She had to line up every picture perfectly and then get the shot perfectly because she was using film instead of digital. I didn’t complain because she was taking the pictures for free but I was really upset because I was tired, hungry and I felt like our guests were just as tired and hungry while waiting for us. We finished about half of the pictures and then we did our “grand entrance” into the church gym (our reception area). We each got a plate of food and then everyone else got in line for their food. We had put the line right behind the head table so everyone could talk to us as we ate but that proved to be annoying because we were doing more talking than eating. Our maid of honor and best man conveniently “disappeared” during this time to go decorate the car and the hotel. Of course, they never told anyone where they went.

Picture taken just as Phillip’s grandpa yells at us

After we ate (the little amount that we ate), we visited a few tables and then were whisked off to finish the pictures. I was so tired and frustrated at this point that I wanted to say “forget it” about the rest but Phillip wanted group pictures of each side of his family (even though I told him it was a bad idea). This took FOREVER! We probably spent another hour finishing up the pictures and as we were taking our last picture, Phillip’s grandpa comes out of the reception area and angrily says “You better hurry up because everyone is leaving already.” I almost lost it but maintained my composure for one last picture. I then took a minute to go cry and went back to the reception area.

I did notice that some of the guests were gone but it certainly wasn’t everyone (obviously). We then cut the cake and did the toasts. The toast was probably my favorite part of the whole day. I cried (happy tears this time) through almost all of the toasts. The last one was our maid of honor and best man who told the embarrassing story of how we started dating (I might share that sometime) and gave us the keys to our hotel room. Shortly after that, we did the getaway and headed to the hotel room to finally get some rest.

Can you see his face? Yeah, me neither.

So there you have it, our disaster wedding. Okay, so it doesn’t seem all that bad but when you add it all together, along with a few things I didn’t mention (like having to sew my mom’s dress at the last-minute), it was pretty disastrous. One of the worst things didn’t even happen until weeks after the wedding. We got our pictures back…and they were AWFUL! The flash was too bright in most pictures, some pictures were too dark, others were just terribly composed. All of the pictures in this post came from our wedding album so you’ll see what I mean. I put the worst one to the left of this paragraph. Can you even make out the face? Yeah, me neither – and the images you see been edited so they were even worse to start.

Even with all of these bad things that happened on our wedding day, we’re happy we got married. We are still very much in love (enough to write a blog together, lol) and very happy together. But one of these days, we’re definitely going to renew our vows – well, actually we’ll say them for the first time, lol.

So did you have any wedding disasters? Tell us about them – misery loves company, dontcha know?


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14 Comments

  1. Your wedding might be on a low budget, it might not be perfect but i guess everyone experiences problems either big or small. I know it is the most special day for you and some unexpected problems occur but take a look at the bright side, you managed to finish your wedding day. I would like to tell you that, Your marriage and your commitment to each other is more important. I am glad you have made it through the 4 years together

  2. Really late to the show here. I have to say, I make it a point at any wedding I attend to feed and water the bride and groom and the mothers. You don’t have to worry about the Dads, they take care of themselves. With all the excitement and nervousness and then talking and talking to everyone, I thought I was going to die from dehydration at my own wedding.

  3. First of All, Contgrats on your 4 year wedding anniversary. I am fascinated by the fact that you managed to spend just under $1000. Wow!
    I remember my wedding was not that enjoyable because you are constantly being told what to do by the wedding planner, and the photographer kept annoying us for poses. I think that guests enjoy the wedding more!

    I am really happy for you that you are still together and in love. Some marriages these days wont even last a year.

    1. Thanks, Fiona! We hit our 5th anniversary back in August and the bad memories of our wedding have faded a bit. It still stings to think about how everything went wrong but it’s not as bad as it was when we first got married.

  4. I wouldn’t worry too much weddings are about love not the day its self although yours wasn’t an amazing day you still have each other.

  5. Thanks for sharing your story. Your wedding is really a disaster but what’s important is the two of you continue your wedding and you enjoy your special day together.

  6. Sorry for your disaster! Didn’t have too much drama, but I freaked out about everything that day, and I wish I would have been more relaxed to enjoy the moment. It went by way too fast, and we also have terrible photos, and none of my immediate family since my photographer didn’t do anything promised. All I can say is, we had an outdoor wedding, and the rain held off until the clean up…so Thank God! Happily Married 8 years this October!

  7. I’m so sorry your day wasn’t what you expected… I can relate!

    My hubby and I had a couple issues too…. First, I was locked out of our apartment the day of, and my dress was still inside! Our apartment manager was gone to a super long lunch. Then when she returned refused to let me in since my ID was in my purse… inside the apartment. Finally was allowed in. After that we were late to hair appointment… then late to get ready. The wedding is about to start, and I hear someone whisper does she know yet….. my future mom in law and bro and sis in law (all part of the ceremony) were MIA!!! (they had to give me a brown paper bag… LOL) Now I can look back and laugh. I wasn’t too happy then though. Oh memories. 😉

    1. I’m not sure if I’m to the point of laughing yet. It’s still a sore subject and when I go to a wedding, I’m a little jealous of how “perfect” it is compared to mine. Oh and did I mention that I kind of want to burn my wedding photos (at least the “pro” ones that his aunt took)?

  8. My only real worry was I didn’t know for sure until he showed up that my Dad would be there to walk me down the aisle, but I had back up plans. My Mom also called me the morning of the wedding to tell me some relatives were coming and she told them it would be fine. She had no concept that caterers had specific #’s. Other than that it was a really beautiful day and we just celebrated our 13th anniversary.

    I have always believed when you focus on being together, the rest doesn’t matter as much, regardless of how much the wedding industry tries to convince you of it.

    1. We had a terrible time getting the food numbers right. In the end, we ended up with WAY too much food. DH told his stepmom to make enough for 300 when we had only invited ~150 plus our church (which was relatively small). When we got back from the hotel the morning after our wedding, the fridge was full and there was food (non-perishables like cookies, crackers, etc) on the counters. We were eating wedding leftovers for weeks, LOL!

      I have to agree with you, though, that the wedding doesn’t really matter. What matters is that you’re married and you love one another. And if it’s meant to be, it’s meant to be. 🙂

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